It might sound counterintuitive, but sometimes, we need a good cry. In a world that often feels overwhelming, intentionally triggering tears can be a powerful tool for emotional release. You might be wondering, “How To Make Yourself Cry?” It’s a question that delves into the fascinating connection between our emotions, our bodies, and even the media we consume. This article explores the reasons why you might want to induce crying, safe and effective methods to do so, and the potential benefits of allowing yourself to shed those tears.
a smartphone, on a blue and white patterned surface, with a black and white crying emoji on the screen,
Understanding the Urge to Cry on Purpose
In recent times, particularly during periods of prolonged stress and uncertainty, the desire to cry has become more pronounced for many. Remember the Qantas ad that went viral a while back? It wasn’t just a clever marketing strategy; it tapped into a collective need for emotional release. The ad, depicting families separated and longing for connection, resonated deeply and, for many, became a catalyst for tears. This wasn’t just about the ad itself; it was about the release it offered.
As highlighted in The New York Times, during periods of intense stress, like a pandemic, allowing yourself to cry can be a way to “break the monotony, crack the clouds open and make it pour.” It’s a conscious decision to confront and release pent-up emotions, a way to acknowledge the weight of our feelings when daily life blurs into a “relentless fog.” This intentional crying isn’t about wallowing in negativity; it’s about actively processing and moving through difficult emotions.
Why Would You Want to Make Yourself Cry? Exploring the Benefits of Tears
The idea of intentionally crying might seem strange, especially in societies where crying is often seen as a sign of weakness. However, research suggests that crying, particularly emotional tears, can have significant benefits for our well-being.
- Stress Reduction and Emotional Release: Studies, including research cited in The New York Times as far back as 1982, indicate that crying can naturally reduce stress. Emotional tears differ from basal (lubricating) and reflex tears; they contain stress hormones like adrenocorticotropic hormone (ACTH). By shedding emotional tears, you are literally expelling stress-related chemicals from your body. This physiological release can lead to a feeling of catharsis and emotional relief.
- Lowering Manganese Levels: Emotional tears also contain manganese, a mineral that, when present in high concentrations in the body, is linked to anxiety. Crying can help regulate these levels and potentially alleviate feelings of anxiety and tension.
- Emotional Processing: Sometimes, we feel the need to cry, but something blocks the release. It could be exhaustion, medication, or simply the need to maintain composure throughout the day. Intentionally creating a space for tears allows us to bypass these blockages and process underlying emotions that might be suppressed.
- Catharsis and Emotional Cleansing: Drawing from the ancient Greek concept of “catharsis,” as described by Aristotle, tragedy can provide emotional purification. Similarly, engaging with emotional content that triggers tears can act as a form of emotional cleansing, allowing us to purge feelings of sadness, grief, or stress.
Effective Methods: How to Make Yourself Cry Safely
If you’re looking for ways on how to make yourself cry, there are several approaches you can consider. It’s important to choose methods that are healthy and don’t involve dwelling on genuinely harmful or traumatic memories unless you are doing so in a therapeutic setting.
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Engage with Tearjerker Media:
- Movies and TV Shows: Melodramas, often exaggerated and emotionally manipulative, are a classic go-to. Consider genres like “sick lit” movies (e.g., A Walk to Remember, The Fault in Our Stars), romantic tragedies (Titanic, The Notebook), or Pixar films known for their emotional depth (e.g., Up, Toy Story series). Websites like Vogue, Elle, and Marie Claire regularly curate lists of movies specifically designed to make you cry.
- Specific Scenes and Montages: If you’re short on time, you can find compilations of sad scenes from TV shows or movies online. Think “saddest moments in Grey’s Anatomy,” the finale montage of Six Feet Under, or iconic emotional scenes like Will Smith’s confrontation with Uncle Phil in The Fresh Prince of Bel Air.
- Music: Sad songs can be incredibly powerful triggers for tears. Create a playlist of emotionally resonant music, particularly ballads or songs associated with poignant memories. Consider live performances known for their emotional impact, like Aretha Franklin’s rendition of “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman” or Beyoncé’s Homecoming concert film.
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Tap into Personal Memories and Emotions:
- Photo Albums and Memory Boxes: Looking through old photos, letters, or mementos can evoke strong emotions associated with past experiences, relationships, or significant life events.
- Journaling and Reflective Writing: Writing about your feelings, losses, or sources of stress can help you access deeper emotions and allow tears to surface.
- Guided Meditations for Grief or Sadness: There are guided meditations specifically designed to help you process grief, sadness, or other difficult emotions. These can create a safe space to feel and release pent-up tears.
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Physical Techniques (Use with Caution):
- Yawning: Force yourself to yawn repeatedly. This can sometimes trigger tear production, although it’s not directly linked to emotional crying.
- Staring Without Blinking: While this primarily produces reflex tears (not emotional tears), the physical discomfort and strain might indirectly contribute to emotional release for some individuals. However, prolonged staring is not recommended and can be harmful to your eyes.
Important Considerations:
- Choose Healthy Triggers: Focus on media or memories that evoke sadness or empathy rather than anger, fear, or trauma, unless you are intentionally processing those emotions in a therapeutic context.
- Create a Safe Space: Find a private and comfortable environment where you feel safe to cry without judgment or interruption.
- Allow Yourself to Feel: Resist the urge to suppress your emotions. Allow yourself to fully experience the sadness and let the tears flow naturally.
- Hydrate: Crying can be dehydrating, so drink water before and after.
- Listen to Your Body: If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed or if intentionally crying becomes a compulsive behavior, seek support from a mental health professional.
Are There Downsides to Intentional Crying? Addressing Counterarguments
While many find cathartic crying beneficial, it’s important to acknowledge that not everyone agrees on its effectiveness or appropriateness.
- Not Always Cathartic for Everyone: Some studies, as cited in Scientific American, suggest that crying doesn’t always lead to improved mood and can sometimes make people feel worse. Individual experiences vary significantly.
- Talking Can Be More Effective: ABC Everyday suggests that while crying can release tension, talking about your feelings might be a more effective form of catharsis and emotional processing in the long run.
- Potential for Emotional Avoidance: If intentionally crying becomes a way to avoid addressing underlying issues or seeking support, it can become a maladaptive coping mechanism.
The Takeaway:
Learning how to make yourself cry intentionally can be a valuable tool for emotional regulation and stress relief for many people. It’s a way to acknowledge and process difficult emotions, release tension, and potentially experience a sense of catharsis. However, it’s not a one-size-fits-all solution, and it’s crucial to use these methods responsibly and be mindful of your emotional well-being. If you are struggling with persistent sadness, anxiety, or emotional distress, seeking professional support from a therapist or counselor is always recommended. Ultimately, understanding your emotional needs and finding healthy ways to address them is key to overall well-being.